The monsoon breeze is blowing and the rains are pouring down at our flat in Jaimahal and I’m inspired to do something I don’t normally do…write a short and honest ‘my diary’ post inspired by some things from my week.
I don’t want to go too much into the past. If you follow my blog then you know about my past year or so in India and the trials and tribulations that I have been dealing with since my arrival. I’m sure to many outside observers it looks as though I’ve been living a fun and exciting life full of constant parties and access to some very interesting people. And in part that is true. But beneath the surface of the party girl and the generally happy-go-lucky blogger who always sees the wonderful, funny and bright side to life in India, I have also been living the hardest and most financially stressful year of my life.
This week I received not one but three emails from readers asking why I stopped writing and why I seem to only be writing reviews of local businesses. They were all lovely mails, all very sweet, simply stating that they missed the normal stories about my life in India and they asked what was going on. Well, what’s going is that because of the stress I’m under lately, I simply can’t think of anything much fun or light or entertaining to write about it. I see the dark side of it all and restaurant and salon reviews are easier to write at times like this. I hadn’t been seeing life the same way I used to because it wasn’t the same anymore. Problems were mounting, the best friend I used to chat to everyday sadly is no longer around and I’ve felt like that little kid in the cartoons with the little rain cloud that follows him everywhere he goes. I was starting to lose all hope, felt alone and almost gave up.
But today I am feeling truly blessed. And for the first time in a very long time I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Yesterday was a big day for a new project I’ve been working on. You know those projects or ideas that people refer to as their baby? Well, it’s like that. I was given the green light to move forward and I couldn’t be happier. It is a game changer for me, for my life, and for the future I can provide for my daughter’s education. Destiny stepped in yesterday … so now the rest just really depends on how hard I work, and I plan to work my tail off because I’m so grateful to have been given an opportunity to change my future. So thankful that India has once again connected me to people who believe and care enough about someone else and someone else’s dreams to make a difference.
I know that soon I will be back to writing about the funny tidbits of life in Bangalore, mothballs, head bobs, spicy food and my driver Shiva. But today this is what it is. And I’d like to say a special thanks to the readers who reached out…was nice to feel some virtual love as a blogger, where my best friend in this endeavor is normally Eduardo my laptop.
© 2012 Angela Carson, Angela’s Adventures in Bangalore